I wrote this in real time, I just haven’t gotten around to posting it, until now.
September 22, 2011
I posted a note on Facebook tonight about my dating challenge. Here it is for posterity’s sake.
A while back, a friend of mine, Tamara Duricka Johnson, set out on a mission. She wanted to experience dating in a way that she had never experienced it before. In anticipation of her 31st birthday she planned 31 dates in 31 days. She wrote about her experiences and has now published a book about it, to be released next month. To celebrate the release she has issued a challenge for others to try something similar. (Tamara’s challenge and a more detailed description can be found here)
Now, it’s my turn. In October I’m turning 33, so this new challenge is not only celebrating Tamara’s book, but is also a great way for me to celebrate my birthday. I’m now sharing my intentions with the Facebook world in order to ask for some help in finding some dates. As part of this challenge here are the rules I’ve decided on.
Length of each date: at least 33 min
Number of dates: 15 (no repeats)
Span of time: 3 weeks
Start date: the first week of October
Max cost of each date: $25 (my treat)
Each date will be either in or near New York City (or maybe Washington DC)
That’s it. Those are my only rules. If a woman is willing to stick with those requirements, she’s in. This means a lot of dates, so if you know anyone willing, please send her my way. (This is also a good time for those who have been scheming to set me up with someone in particular to let me know.)
At this point you might be asking why I’m doing this. This isn’t an attempt to see how many women I can convince to go out with me and I’m not really interested in much publicity. Instead, what I intend to accomplish is to genuinely change and improve my perspectives about dating. Over the years I’ve dated here and there but it has usually been without much purpose or direction and I want to change that; I want to test my assumptions and beliefs about dating and improve my skills as a dating companion.
Feel free to ask any questions, provide some date suggestions (either who to go out with or what to do), or provide any other feedback that you would like to share.
Marcus
After posting it my anxieties started getting to me and I now I wonder if I’ll be taken as sincere and genuine in my endeavors. Will the fact that I’ve advertised my desires to go out with 15 different women over 3 weeks time be taken as shameless self-promotion? Or will it be seen as how I see it, a sincere attempt to become a better dater? I’ve committed myself to this and it has begun. I can and will do this.
September 24, 2011
In less than 24 hours I have already lined up 3 different women for me to go out with. My anxiety over the project has been somewhat alleviated. It’s quite possible that I will have more than enough dates to the point that I might just extend my project. Tomorrow I will plan a little more in depth.
September 26, 2011
I’ve made a calendar, scheduled two dates, made a list of women confirmed but not scheduled, and also made a “wish list” comprised of suggestions from others and my own brainstorming. The total number is more than 15. While 15 is my goal, I’d rather have too many than not enough.
September 28, 2011
I didn’t want to do anything with this tonight. The task seems so daunting but I still felt like I should do something. I took into consideration all the suggestions I was offered. Any woman that was suggested more than once (including my own suggestions) was automatically in. Then I chose those who I wanted to ask out and then added all the suggestions I got that I don’t know yet. After all of that, I sent out a few emails (that was probably poor form on my part, but I’m tired and cranky right now and really don’t feel like actually calling anyone). I’m still working on getting over the should thing though. This is an adventure and an opportunity for growth. I just hope I can get through this with my sanity intact.
September 30, 2011
I have my first date lined up for next Monday. She offered to plan it. Normally I would take a chivalrous/ borderline chauvinistic approach and would say something like, “that’s the man’s job so let me be the man!” However, this project is about learning and experiencing dating in ways I’ve never experienced before. I can’t wait!
(update: she got sick and had to reschedule)
